Saturday, April 30, 2011

my heart...

... goes out to you, where ever you are.

For how much I love music, you'd think I'd be able to carry a tune. Nope. Not unless you call "singing" loudly in my car at the top of my lungs carrying a tune. It's cool, my childhood dreams of playing sold out concerts were never going to truly be a reality. I love music, I love words, I love the feeling a song can give you. But most of all I love old music. I love old everything come to think about it, especially the 1940s :)  This is my favorite picture.

 This week I realized that I should have been born in any era but the 90s. I mean think about it people, America used to have so much passion, so much pride in their country. Where did it go? We need to remember where we came from, the battles we've fought, the men and women we've lost fighting to defend us. After September 11th America was filled with passion. We all came together and everywhere you looked there were flags flying. But once the shock wore off and the hysteria calmed down, they all disappeared. I love this country, and I love what we stand for. We owe our lives to our men and women in uniform. I challenge you all to thank a soldier, any soldier you see. I myself am special and will walk up to anyone and shake their hand and say thank you for defending our country when I see them in uniform, but I'm not asking anyone to be as awkward as me :) Just remember those who came before us, and that we wouldn't be here today without them.
Where is our determination?
WWII vets that managed to emerge alive after the sinking of the USS Arizona.
Speaks for itself.

God Bless America.
If you haven't listened to this song lately please take a listen and remember why you should be proud to who we are and appreciate those who defend us every single day.





Wednesday, April 27, 2011

there's more to the story...

... then what you think you see.

Today sitting in school, a school full of girls mind you, I took a second, sat back, and listened. Sure I heard about hair, I heard conversations about weekends, and shopping and so forth. But what caught my attention was how incredibly judgmental people were being towards someone. Since when do we look down upon someone due to their race, sexual preference, or style? Since when do we give ourselves the right to take one look at someone and peg them with a title? I'd be lying through my teeth if I said I never did this, but hell, who gave ME any right? No one, that's the answer. No one gave us any right to categorize someone, put them into a little box, and put a cruel, demeaning, or scandalous title it to. Not only do we not have the right to do this, but maybe in turn we should look within ourselves to see if we fit into some "category" before judging someone else. I can't tell you how much my heart sank when I heard what people had to say about someone who, to me is such a kind, open, and caring individual whom we just met. He was putting himself out there and people were tearing him down because of one thing; his sexuality. I'm not asking you to believe in it or support it, but why can't people accept it it's 2011 for crying out loud. It caught me so off guard that just because this individual dressed different, had different hair, and was outgoing people were already putting him in some box and pushing it away without knowing them. This isn't just a sexuality thing, it's an everyday thing. What someone is wearing, how someone chose to do their hair, anything that could possibly give someone the chance to say something, and I bet you it has been said. 

Sorry for the rant I was literally just so angry when I saw how people were talking about this person. And of course it was one of those situations where you say something, not even with an attitude, and you're the bad guy because you were standing up for someone. Well, I have no problem taking some shit for someone when I believe in them. I had the pleasure of doing a friends mothers hair this morning who I love dearly. We had amazing conversations about re-enactments and all the amazing things she knows about the past. It reminded me why I love doing what I do. She didn't look at me as someone who was in school, she didn't talk down to me because I was younger, we just talked. And if you know me I love to talk :) I truly hope I get to do her hair again soon. 

This past weekend was Easter and I got the opportunity to finally go up to PA to visit my family. I love when I get to go up there because it doesn't get to happen often. I spent the weekend with Lex and Dev doing random stuff like helping Aunt Karen make these awesome cupcakes...
And taking pictures like these...
Lex :)
and Devvvv :)
and Nick :)

We had an awesome weekend, and ended with Water for Elephants, if you haven't seen it I highly suggest it. It is amazing and makes me want to have grown up back then more then ever!
Well maybe you made it this far I kinda had a long one today but I just hope it you at least read the beginning that you take some time and get to know someone before judging, even if it's just one person.
Stay true, stay you, and as always stay inspired :)
love, tiff.



Friday, April 22, 2011

My life as I know it.

I truly wonder sometimes if God really does have some huge plan. I know that I'm supposed to trust Him no matter what, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't sometimes wonder. Right now I feel as though I am not living to my full potential, I feel like I can, and need to do more. I am nearing the last few months of school and slowly, very slowly, greeting my future. And by very slowly, I mean running, full speed, in the other direction. This, my friends, is not like me. I used to be fun, loving, carefree (to an extent) and so ready for whatever gets thrown my way. I still am all these things, but I feel as though something is holding me back. Recently I reconnected with someone I met in New York City; Devin is an amazing hair stylist, friend, and mentor. He truly wants to help me get where we are I am destined to go...
The big apple. Though I have never really understood that expression.

I want to be where I need to be for everything to fall into place, following? Maybe I'm just lost in myself, or maybe I'm not being honest with myself. But how am I ever going to know? Is there a sign, does something magically appear? No? Alright, fine but I can't stand not knowing! I am now in the honors program at school, aka Phase Two, and I have surgery in less then two weeks. I need to begin finding a fill in job so I can save up for New York, or where ever I go, and I need to make business cards, finish my portfolio, andddd work on finalizing my resume to the best of my ability. Did I mention I need/want this all to be done by the end of July? Oh, and stay late at school so I can bust my ass and be done by the end of July. Yeah, I bring it upon myself, but I think it's safe to say I'm a little bit stressed. Not to mention this weekend is Easter and we're heading to PA tomorrow. Finally get to see Alexa! 
My bestest cousin ever :)

When I get stressed, I make lists. To do lists, to be exact. So now that is what I am going to do. I also want to make cookies :) Have an amazing Easter weekend everyone, stay inspired!


Monday, April 18, 2011

a few of my favorite things :)

It's been an eventful week and weekend, but there are a few things I want to share with you :) Lately I've been truly to figure out who I am. Big task right? You're tellin' me. Not only has to left me to make at least ten pros and cons lists, then make a five year plan, and then make a dream board for the five year plan. All to come to the same conclusion I came to before...I have absolutely no idea what I want. Then I sat down and started writing; just writing. About what you ask? Anything. Words, names, sounds, feelings, I even started drawing. And what was coming out was little bits and pieces of me. My fears, my dreams, my goals; they all are surrounded on what makes me happy, what makes me smile. Silly me could have figured it all out easier but I like to make things difficult for myself, you can ask anyone that knows me. I might not say the right thing all the time, I might not make everyone happy, but you know what I need to learn that if I'm not happy I can't make anyone else happy. I've been fighting against myself for so long that I've only been holding myself back. I might not make you all proud all the time but you should know I try really hard to. So here are some things that make me smile :)

Some of the boys from Invisible Children... they are absolutely amazing in every way possible. After learning about this insanely awesome organization I am seriously contemplating taking off some time in the fall and being a Roadie with them and help bring awareness :) Thank you for changing my life.

My new Lily Pulitzer glasses, I can finally see :)

Hayley Williams being on the cover of Cosmo :) She is amazing and her music is insane!

This awesome moo moo mug from Pier 1 Imports that I found today!

And the insane plethora of pillows they have :) 

One of my favorite 80s movies ever :)

Oh anddddd I learned how to drive a stick! I was quite proud of myself. Sadly I broke my phone it now looks like this...
:( not a happy camper!

Anyways that's all I got for now loves! I had some amazing conversations these past couple days that have really set me in the right direction, and this amazing weather made me so happy I hope it did the same for you! Stay true, stay you, and as always stay inspired! :) SMILE.

ps. Some days I think I'm a badass, today is one of those days :) hee hee.






Sunday, April 10, 2011

through the lens.

Today I don't have a ton to say, I just want to share some pictures that have inspired me :) Enjoy...














These pictures (minus the last one) are all from the National Geographic website. I truly love finding pictures on there that make me realize there is s much more in this world. We go through our day to day lives worrying, stressing, and so fixated on what's "important". Sometimes we forget to look around and see what's right there in front of us. So much is happening from the Government making budget cuts, when they are actually cutting our military's pay. These men and women defend us every single day, putting their lives on the line, and we're cutting their pay? I personally know many people in different branches of the military and to think that they are defending us and loosing money just astounds me. I would like to personally thank all our soldiers for everything that they do for us every single day. I am amazed at your strength, commitment, and determination to keep us safe at home. You are all in my prays every day, and I owe my life to you. 

All I ask of you today/tomorrow (since it's late that I am posting this) is to take a moment and stop, put down whatever it is in your hands (yes that includes cell phones) and even if you don't believe in God say a few words for those we have lost throughout our nations history do to wars, or battles, or terrorist attacks. Take a moment and pause to say thank you. 
I may not be some amazing writer, or a great example of what anyone should want to be but today I've come to realize I am me, and I can't make excuses, I won't make excuses for who I am. It's slightly liberating :)
Stay true, stay you, and inspire someone to be the best that they can be :)













Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Ink may fade, but memories are forever.

Yesterday was TOMS day without shoes; you sacrifice one day without shoes for all those who don't have a choice. For those of you who don't know about TOMS shoes, it's the kind of deal where when you purchase one pair of shoes one pair goes to a kid who doesn't have any. One for one, what a simple yet effective concept that is realistic. I've these black TOMS for over a year now and they're pretty beaten up, I tend to wear them a whole lot :) So I got the brilliant idea to write on them in bleach, we'll see how it goes once it dries and all that but hey, it was a good idea. C'est la vie is French for "this is the life",  sometimes I feel like people get so caught up in work, school, drama, anything and they loose sight of the fact that we only have one life and well quite frankly, shit happens. If you haven't accepted that yet, I can't help ya. This life is a gift but sometimes you gotta say the hell with it and have some fun. C'est la vie to me means always remembering that there is something way worse that could be happening to me and even though that doesn't make it any better it puts things into perspective, even if just for a quick moment.

Speaking of quick moments, I want to share with all of you a few things that will last me a lot longer then just a quick moment...
My tattoos.
(Photo by Lindsey Plevyak)

Ink is something that is so beloved to me, it's where you're words are brought into this world, it's where the simple act of writing something can be the beginning of a great work of art. Ink is more then just an essential part to tattooing something onto your body; ink is art. Tattooing is art. My tattoos started as an obsession, in the end they've all been last minute decisions. Everyone gives me weird looks when I say this but those last minute decisions have given me some of the best gifts, they've given me memories, and they've given me a way to remember someone very important to me forever. My first tattoo began simply as a clover with four leaves representing faith, love, hope, and luck. 
(Photo by Lindsey Plevyak)
My heritage is mainly Irish and I knew it was something that I'd always want to pay homage to. It wasn't at first that I realized I wanted to make it a memorial piece. Which brings us to number two, my quote. "From nothing, comes nothing." Originally pulled from Shakespeare's King Lear this quote was brought to my attention by a very important person in my life, my art history professor, Professor Winer. This woman taught me more then she will ever know. Which is why it being Shakespeare is even more important, because another teacher, this one from high school, taught me more about myself and life then I could have ever thanked him for. Mr. Delise wasn't exactly loved by everyone but he demanded respect and well, he got it. These two teachers mean the world to me because they taught me that if you don't put anything in, any hard work or tears or sweat, you aren't going to get anything out and that's what "from nothing, comes nothing" means, you have to put something in to get something out. 
When I went to get this I realized that I wanted to add my Nana's initials to my four leaf clover. My Nana, my mom's mom, was my rock growing up. I grew up in the same house as my mom did and my Nana lived with us, and from the time I was born to the day she died she was always taking care of me. She hit her head and it began a battle with early onset Alzheimer's disease. One moment I had my Nana, someone I loved so much and the next I had someone who couldn't remember me. She passed away in April of the 5th grade for me and she will be forever missed. RIP Nana, we love you.
My third tattoo was the addition of the feather onto the quote. I found this tattoo on a stamp and the next day got it tattooed on me. The feather's meaning is just to remember to always soar, keep pushing on and one day it'll all be worth it.
(Photo by Lindsey Plevyak)
Lastly, we have the horseshoe. 

I grew up riding horses, and it is my first true love. The bond you can create, the friends you make, and the lessons you learn are truly amazing. I have learned what true hard work means, and I have made some life long friends along the way. The riding community is so amazing, and I couldn't have asked for a better way to grow up... well minus two concussions and multiple breaks to the tailbone :) My life wouldn't be the same without Alex in it and we worked our asses of every Sunday morning for well over a year and I wouldn't have changed it for the world because I love that girl to death and I don't know what I'd do without her :)
(Love you Ales!!)
 I made an amazing friends from that chapter in my life and I became the person I am now from all the incredible and truly inspiring people I had the pleasure of meeting during that time of my life. This horseshoe isn't just a horseshoe to me, it's a symbol of where I became me. I know that my ribbons are collecting dust and my boots still are sitting in the basement, but those things, the material things, can collect all the dust they want because nothing will ever amount to how thankful I am for having had the ability to spend 10+ years covered in mud, with bruises, and a huge smile on my face. 
(we're so little, miss you Dai!)

These tattoos aren't just tattoos to me, they are my life thus far. I began with my Nana, I grew up into who I am today because I rode horses, and I will continue to be who I am because I will always remember to put in everything I have and not let myself give less. Tattoos are looked down upon for whatever reason, but tattoos are art, they are true, unique ways to say whatever it is you want to say. I hope I didn't put you all to sleep because these memories are near and dear to my heart and these tattoos are representations of me :) I hope you enjoyed. 
Thank you Lindsey for those amazing pictures you're a true artist :) Love you all, and I hope I inspired you today!




Sunday, April 3, 2011

you are the best thing.

So lately I've been doing a lot of thinking. I've come to the conclusion that there are so many things in this world that we can not control. We can't control the thoughts of others, or the way someone looks at us. We sure as hell can't control what happens, or change they way something played out in the past. And we can't change who we were meant to be. I'll never be a size 2, or be 6 feet tall and walk a runway in Milan. But that doesn't make me any less me; I feel like lately everyone has been trying to be something that they aren't, and here's a little secret, it doesn't work. I can't tell you how many times I've looked in a mirror and found numerous things I'd like to change about myself, but now I've decided to challenge myself and instead when I look in the mirror I have to tell myself something I'd never change. I dare you to try it. I have been blessed to have many amazing people in my life over the years that have loved me for me, but lately it seems that someone people only love me when I take them somewhere, or when I have something they need. Which takes me to my second thought today, friendships. 
Too often have I lost friends for no reason. Maybe it's something I didn't realize I was doing or maybe they just didn't want to be my friend. I call these people fakers. I don't understand why you would be friends with someone if you have no intention of truly being that persons friend. If you know me you know that my friends are my family. I will always hold a special place in my heart for my friends, and over the years I've made some truly amazing ones. I've also been hurt by some people very badly, but what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger right? Sure. At this point in my life I've learned that people come and go in your life and the ones that truly matter are the ones that will come back. Since I moved here 7 years ago I've had roughly 10 or so true friends come in and out of my life, and I'm grateful for everyone of them, but I know that sometimes people are supposed to leave your life. This journey, aka life, isn't easy and it's harder when you don't have someone by your side to tell you it'll be okay or to just make you smile. My friends make me who I am, and I wouldn't change that for the world. Today I went to Starbucks (aka heaven) with my oldest friend here, Jenna. I met Jenna freshmen year when I was brand new in math class, algebra part a to be exact. We weren't really close till junior year, the year my life decided to go and get complicated. I don't know what I would have done without her those last two years of high school. I spent a week with her and her family in Ocean Shitty and from then on I've considered myself an honorary Reid :) This girl and I have been through it all, and I mean if it could have happened to a friendship it most likely happened to us, yet I still love her to death and would do anything for her. I mean come on I set her up with one of my close guys friends at the time and now they will be celebrating their 3 years in August, and yes I know I really should take up being cupid in my spare time. But mainly I love her because she's a true person. What do I mean by that? I've seen this girl in every mood there is and she's still an amazing, beautiful, loving person no matter what life throws her way. You'll go far punk :)
(we look like babies!)

The thing that I love about the people I've chosen to keep in my life right now is that they all understand my crazy schedule, and I think that's why I've lost some people because they just want to be friends when it works for them. Friendship isn't easy, it tends to sometimes be work. I'll never let my friends down, you can count on that. 

I feel like sometimes the people we surround ourselves with hold us back. I've been wondering lately what I want, and somehow I find myself weighing in what everyone in my life would think or have to say about it. And I know that's not what I should be thinking. I'm trying to find myself, find my style, and my place in this world; and I'm on the right path. I do something that I love, I make time for myself and my friends, and I have loud obnoxious dance parties in my room at least once a day. I say I'm doin alright. I don't want to let myself not give my all, and I know I come up short a lot. I'm working on it. I love where I am right now but I feel like I need to take some risks. Maybe I'll tell someone how I really feel or go shave half my head (haha sike, although if I was badass enough I totally would). We all need to take life a little less seriously, and just breathe. What is important today might be nothing tomorrow. God is a topic I haven't really touched because I'm still trying to figure out my relationship with him but I know that he, or whoever or whatever it is out there in this crazy universe, has some insane plan for me and I've come to terms with the fact that yeah, my life is in my hands but that someone will always be there for me, and that's Him. This blog post has been long and if you're still with me I applaud you :) Good job! So now I'm gonna by bleach my TOMS cause I'm lame but tonight tell yourself something you love about you, cause I love you just the way you are! I'm going to leave you with some pictures of the amazing people in my life but till tomorrow, as always, stay inspired :) You are the only one holding you back...

I could keep going, but I love you all and I don't know what I'd do without my friends...you all are amazing :)